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Saturday, November 12, 2011

"Orange" you Glad for Adoption??

BIB had the amazing opportunity to participate in The 6th Annual Adoption Walk With Me this year at Liberty Park in Salt Lake City, Utah.  We had such an incredible time and I wanted to share a few experiences that I had, and a few thoughts that came to me during this 5K!....



First of all, we wanted to thank the AMAZING group that put this event on!  It was so wonderful, organized and so much fun.  Even with the cold, cold weather they made sure we were all as comfortable as possible and made the entire event worth it!  They have such an amazing passion for adoption and it SHINES through in their work!  THANK YOU for allowing us to be a part of something that we treasure so dearly!

I am so so grateful for my amazing partner and husband for his support...he is such a blessing to myself and to this organization!  I think that the BIG TOUGH GIRL shirt on him was a HIT!.....and he wore it proudly!  The "adoption" world is a little new and different to him but he is so willing to jump right in and be a part of whatever it is that is important to me!  I asked him to write a little bit about his perspective on the race and the connection that adoption creates between complete strangers!  



From the mouth of John:

"First of all let me say that it is ok to be labeled as a girl for a day!! haha..I think the shirt was a hit. It definitely caused people to approach me and ask who I was supporting and how I was linked to the adoption cause.  I really enjoyed being at the event and interacting with all of the people who attended. Everyone was warm and welcoming and very open and eager to share their stories and to hear others.  I think BIB made some new friends, and I am looking forward to being more pro-active in the future about attending other events and expanding our connecions in this community."


As soon as we got there we signed in and got to fill out our "We Walk in Celebration Of" card that was taped to our backs!  I LOVED this!  It was one of my very favorite things about the event....it allowed everyone to see whether we were supporting birthmoms, adoptive families, babies AND MORE!  So many people had long lists on their backs...there were parents there supporting daughters, brothers there walking in support of their sisters, husbands there supporting their wives, families there supporting birthparents...It was awesome!! 

My husband and I both rocked signes that supports ALL Birthmoms!  "Big Tough Girls" as BIB likes to call them....and then of course I added my sweetheart Derek who will be 6 in a few months!  WOW...It was great to be out there for him!  I was thinking about him so much today while we walked...thinking about his amazing family and how much they truly meant to me, how much they have truly changed my life, how much I truly and deeply love them!  It was so overwhelming to see other adoptive families there showing love to the birthparents!  I love to see the "Other Side" of adoption...it warms my heart! 




It was so exciting have people walk past us and say "Oh, you are the Big Tough Girl girl!"  It was such a positive reassurance that I am doing something important...something that I love...something that is making a difference...no matter how small!!  I got to meet people in person that I knew of, people that I have communicated back and forth with, and people that I couldn't wait to meet! 

I am a big fan of the blog BABY DARLING and if you are in the adoption circle most of you would know who Benjamin is.  In the birthmom business you don't often get to hear positive the things about birthfathers...and there are some AMAZING  birthfathers, supportive to the birthmom, heartbroken over the loss of a child etc.  Benjamin is one of those men.  We had the opportunity to walk and talk with him over the course of the 5K and it was so interesting as a birthmom with not a great taste in my mouth about Derek's birthfather  but more so the situation....not the person...{unfortunately in this business you are guilty by association...}  We talked a lot about perspective and having the maturity to see both sides...with GREAT understanding...finding a place that you can come together on common ground..understanding that BOTH parties are dealing and coping and adjusting and making decisions that they feel is best for themselves, the baby, family etc.  Even though {Idaho} and myself don't have any relationship now and have issues of our own and I have my own thoughts and feelings about how everything went down I still feel that he dealt with the situation the BEST WAY HE COULD...even if I didn't agree, even if everything about it felt wrong to me, even if it was different than how I had to deal with it....he was still doing the best that he could, he was trying to protect not just himself but those that he loved.  Benjamin talked about his great understading of why the birthmoms are protective and have little patience for "thinking, or confusion" when it comes to the birthfathers, their baby etc.  He was amazing and showed a great deal of respect to birthmoms in general.  I feel very honored to have had the chance to talk with him and to see the other side of a birthparent was very refreshing. 


I also had the chance to connect with a "new birthmother" KATE who placed just 3 months ago!  She was there with her brother {great supporter} and she was the sweetest thing!  I was so so proud of her for coming out and participating.  Getting out as a new birthmom and being around so many "happy" people supporting adoption can be hard, especially when the placement is so FRESH on your mind.  I think it was a wonderful thing for her to see so many happy, adjusted families, and happy adjusted birthmoms!  It gave a great deal of hope.....even for people like me..5 and a half years into it, seeing birthmoms that are 11-15 years into it still there...smiling, happy, adjusted and IN LOVE with what adoption has done for them! 


It was amazing to watch people from behind all walking for the SAME purpose, all there supporting the same people...supporting adoption and everything that it represents!  I was so honored to be there among so many amazing people that have sacrificed so much, opened their homes, their lives and hearts to adoption.  It was such a great thing and I look forward to getting more and more involved in the community events just like these..connecting with people that share the same heart about this amazing journey!
We will be there again next year...maybe with some bells on our toes this time! 


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